If it's Not One Thing it's Another!

Hold On, Hold On the Light will come... (good song too Youtube it!)

I feel tension all the way over here in my basement!  
So, let me start with 3 Nephi 11:29 
For verily verily I say unto you, he that hath the spirit of contention is not of me, but is of the devil, who is the father of contention, behold this is not my doctrine...  

and ask for us to not have contention between us as a family members especially and then say a prayer before I start writing and before you start reading....

So to begin with I'm investigating, searching, learning, defining.... 

definition of Testimony - a statement or declaration, evidence of support of fact or statement of truth used under oath or in Faith of God 

definition of Polygamy is to have more than one spouse/Partners. But polygamy itself has different types or ways to live it...

• polygany: What most of religious sectors practice,Man with multiples wives, and can be pre-determinated amount of wives (like Islam) or undetermined number of wives (like Bible)
• Polyandry: Women with multiples husbands, isnt so commum but it is practice in certain cultures( in Asia and africa)and some pagan cults
• Polyamory: is the practice, desire, or acceptance of having more than one intimate relationship at a time with the knowledge and consent of everyone involved. Many contend that it is distinct from both swinging (which often emphasizes sex with others as merely recreational) or with 
• Polysexual (which is attraction towards multiple genders and/or sexes) encompassing or characterized by many different kinds of sexuality not simplified by the term bi-sexual.

Ok so see I'm already learning! and this is just how I have to do this  - be patient with me and Thank you for asking questions - for I am slothful and need causes, focus a push to go and study for the most part.  I do like learning, it's just such a task and requires so much concentration on my part (I think Ayris might have that gene too)!  

• Covenant: an agreement between God and Man, but they do not act as equals in the agreement.  God gives the conditions for the covenant, and men (Or women) agree to do what he asks them to do. God then promises certain blessings for their obedience.  Much like an earthly contract - you get something (electricity, house, car etc) promise to pay the bill, and if you don't the owner of the contract will turn it off or kick you out!  (see that's how I understand it or relate to it!).
• http://www.lds.org/ensign/1985/08/what-i-hope-you-will-teach-your-children-about-the-temple?lang=eng
• Service:Care given or work done for the benefit of God or others. As we serve others we serve God.
• LORD - all caps in the Bible = Jesus Christ

Ok I'm reading links and blogs and web pages  -  Can I just say - Really I am grateful that I am a simple minded person.  That I am blessed with a seed of Faith already in me - I know that I am, I have to have been to be where I am at in my life spiritually, I am grateful for that blessing.

Tuesday night we went to the Temple, this time I went with the intention of getting answers!  We are taught to go with a specific question, I don't always do that but I did on Tuesday...

• One of my Questions was Why do we do this, go to the Temple? Why do we come here and do the same thing over and over again.  But then we go to church every sunday and do the same thing there to right?  I never question that?
• my second question came from seminary - Why does the Church get a bad rap, bad press you know look awful and nonsensical in the media?

I must try to explain that I felt totally drained when the session was over.  The first impression I had was "We come to the Temple to give service." (Like real words someone talking to me in my head.)  It's a sacrifice of time to go and do this.  It does take an effort and is rewarding, it brings peace to my soul.  Because each time when I go back I am going in place of someone else, it truly is an act of service.  I'm not very good at that (as I've discussed before) so YaY! go me I'm doing service.

So Ok that answered that for me. simple.

But then throughout the session I kept hearing seeing feeling more things like we are there to learn, we are taught about the creation, charity, choice and accountability, purpose on the earth, we make covenants to do those things and to be moral, The purpose of Joy but that we can't have it without sorrow, instructed what to do to get back to be with our families, Jesus Christ and our Father in Heaven.

• Today I was given an article an essay if you will that explained the idea of joy and sorrow to me and the consequence of choice and the reason for knowing and trusting God and Jesus Christ well enough to get thru and do all of this.  A small excerpt was stated like this and yet there was so much more good stuff (so I have included a link to it at the bottom of the paragraph....  
• "God apparently uses such a unique and uniquely troubling test because it is the only way to teach us something paradoxical but true and very important about the universe — that trust in our personal experiences with divinity must sometimes outweigh our rational morality. Obedience to the divine commands that come directly to us must sometimes supersede our understanding of earlier commands if we are ever to transcend the human limitations of even our best inherited culture and religion. We must learn, sometimes very painfully, to be open to continuous revelation. We must learn such a lesson partly because truth and history are too complex to be reduced to simple, irrevocable com­mandments — even from past prophets — like “Thou shalt not kill” or “Thou shalt always have only one spouse.” Truth is ultimately “rational,” but it is not always or immediately clear to our present reason."

http://www.eugeneengland.org/on-fidelity-polygamy-and-celestial-marriage   - thanks anona  It's kinda over my head but a good read and plenty for me to study and reread.  I thought it worth the effort. 

Which leads me to my next question - and an answer in one eternal, what does he call it? paradox!  One reason we get bad press, a bad rap don't look good to the world.  I remember that Ayris did a paper and a illustration board to go with it for a display and grade required for History in Junior High.  She did this report on the Mormon trek west in 1846 - 47 her grade was dropped a whole level because she "left out the fact that mormons believe in Polygamy".  So let's talk about that for a second!  Well I've found out today that The World and Religion as a whole have used polygamy at times for different reasons and different purposes I listed some definitions at the beginning maybe they caught your eye, maybe not feel free to re read them now!  So I've been reading off and on since Friday or Saturday night about this topic and really most of this day for more knowledge more answers mainly to confirm what I already do or do not believe I guess.

1. FIrst of all I have found that you can find anything on the internet - anything from Doctrine to - can I say BS? probably not in this blog so let's leave it at - ANYTHING.  I like the quote "Philosophies of Men mingled with scripture".  Although I also understand that Doctrine and BS are relative to what you are looking for and believe.
2.  The fact is and the thing I don't get is the stories are all the same, why is it all confusing anyway?  The scriptures don't change, so why do people really get confused and give us a hard time? for instance; In the Old testament the Prophets talked to God face to face, they got commandement and gave them to the people, they prayed for the people to repent, they (some of them at different times) lived Polygamy Abraham, Jacob and other ancient prophets had plural wives.  Abraham had 2 or 3 and Jacob his grandson had 4 thru these 4 wives we have the 12 tribes of Israel thru them we have covenants and the Priesthood.  A line of heritage, lineage links to blessings.
3. Prophets throughout the scriptures made mistakes.  God needed different wives for different lineage, the lineage travels thru the Mother. I always find it interesting and sometimes question the way that life plays out and then remember that God knew that was going to happen.  I have asked why didn't He just say the second son would always inherit because so many times the first son screws up?  Dare to not judge them. FREE AGENCY. https://www.lds.org/ensign/1984/12/early-signs-of-the-apostasy?lang=eng They had to do things I don't ever want to have to do - ever.  We are the "natural man" we have to and it's part of the Plan to learn to choose Light or Darkness.  I just know I would never have believed I'd live in Valley Nebraska!  I just had to come to earth to see it  happen, to believe it for myself and answer for it!!!  We will talk more about the steps to Apostasy another day.

Well, I've thought and considered and reconsidered this today.  I guess I'm coming back to what I tell my children when they leave the house, "remember who you are" and "You can always find what you are looking for no matter where you are."  I know that I've had to find my own testimony of what I believe.  I've learned that for me I need to do it "ONE THING" at a time.  I've had spiritual experiences to confirm knowledge of a few things, I've had scriptures teach me a few more things, Life teaches me something every day, IF I LET IT... but that's the thing. "IF" I let it.  I can question I can be negative and bitter and - what is it called - a skeptic  - but why? Why not have HOPE.  
The first time I felt hope, that I HAD to feel hope and not be a skeptic was when my sister died If the scriptures hadn't helped me - I read Ether 12:4-7, well I don't want to share exactly where I'd be and I know where that is, cuz I went there when my Daddy died, this was worse and I couldn't go back. 
 Satan is like a Vampire - he has to be invited in. Don't do it.

4Wherefore, whoso believeth in God might with ^asurety ^bhopefor a better world, yea, even a place at the right hand of God, which ^chope cometh of ^dfaith, maketh an ^eanchor to the souls of men, which would make them sure and steadfast, always abounding in ^fgood works, being led to ^gglorify God.

 5 And it came to pass that Ether did prophesy great and marvelous things unto the people, which they did not believe, because they ^asaw them not.

 6 And now, I, Moroni, would speak somewhat concerning these things; I would show unto the world that ^afaith is things which are^bhoped for and ^cnot seen; wherefore, dispute not because ye see not, for ye receive no ^dwitness until after the ^etrial of your faith.

 7 For it was by faith that Christ showed himself unto our fathers, after he had risen from the dead; and he showed not himself unto them until after they had faith in him; wherefore, it must needs be that some had faith in him, for he showed himself ^anot unto the world.

Ok this you can't judge, cuz this is said from my heart with all sincerity;

I went there (to the dark once or twice) because I didn't have a sure enough foundation, an anchor, a faith or a hope or a knowledge of really any "One Thing" except maybe that my Mom was a wonderful faithful heartwarming woman who unconditionally loved me.  I now have Faith in the Scriptures.  I have Faith in promises.  I have watched my sons go on missions grow and change and become converted, I seen my daughters go through crazy life crisises and I've read of the General Authorities between them all I've seen and felt miracles - preaching the gospel, testifying of Christ, Going and Doing.  Personally I believe we can't do our own miracles or get those revelations because we aren't that close to God and Jesus Christ Daily because - we aren't exerting ourselves. 
Just like any motivational speaker or testimony giver I pray and encourage us to exert ourselves every day for the Good, towards Light. This I do know - that when I question, doubt, judge others - I can't breathe, life sucks and darkness falls around me.  Believe me I know I have a long way to go, I have issues and Big Fatty problems - I could, we could fall but it's step by step not a big drop into the dark side, when we loose our families, loose our belief system and once we go there our pride our vanity our lack of willpower and self esteem keeps us there and then what, then we have nothing. The other thing is we are individuals we learn at different paces we understand at different levels we aren't always ready to hear truths and without the Holy Ghost without asking for the Holy Ghost to help us learn that confirmation, that peace and burning and answer aren't going to be there.
It sounds so simple to just say  - either Joseph Smith saw 2 Heavenly Beings and was handed the keys to the Temple by more Heavenly Beings and all that was seen by witnesses who whether they still go to church or not never denied that it happened or it didn't.  But it is that simple  - to me anyway and only because it's one of my "ONE Things" -  it's all in the scriptures we don't need to keep Deseret Book or the Internet or any anti material in business - just read your scriptures and Pray, pray often, with real intent ask your questions there on your knees in prayer and Do It always and Fast, (don't eat - not in a hurry!) fast for yourself and for others, take your questions to the Temple if you can go there. 
Believe me I don't want anyone digging into my mistakes and playing telephone tag with what they learn or anything like unto it and it's my opinion that we all make mistakes and that people are stupid and spread, embellish, blow out of proportion those mistakes and hand them down for generations - after all I am a McCoy I've seen it, I've lived it.   I don't wish that on anyone.  
The gospel is out there in it's many many forms, President Hinckley taught that all religions have a portion of the truth we just want to add to what they already have.  I believe that "One Thing" along with many other "one things" I've added to my foundation along the way One brick at a time.
I believe in the stories in the scriptures even though I don't have a memory and I have to study for hours to remember them to comprehend them to reconfirm their truth, I do believe in their "types and shadows" and in their "patterns". 
Oh my babies! and my family and friends please, keep searching - that is a good character trait - a talent if you will, don't let it turn into a "weakness".  Find that "One thing" that you know is true or that you can just "believe in" today and make it be positive and full of light, something that brings you JOY and not just happiness (for Joy is long lasting - happiness is fleeting) and especially if you think you discovered something knew don't let it bring you pain (if you feel pain, notice depression or darkness RUN!) and do it everyday - EVERYDAY find joy and light carry that image of Christ with you and your day, week, life will be better.  Amen

I hope it makes sense to someone out there I know I learned alot and I'm going to try harder to study and pray more everyday.  

thank you for your questions keep asking them - in the light! Hold on to the Light, cuz truly if it's not One Thing it's Another!