"Sandwich Generation"

At first I was labeled "the tail end of the Baby Boomers",
 but today I understand I have a new label  "The Sandwich Generation"

I was told once that "you can only have 1 queen in a kitchen" let me tell ya I've learned that the hard way by having One Aunt, a mother-in-law and My own sweet Mother living in my kitchen!!!!!    Let's go to the old school paper journals I have a few .........

My friend Debbie used to come over cuz she said I made the best sandwiches!
 I guess if I can have cheese on it everything will be ok!!!

One entry goes like this... 

My dear sweet Mother
towards the end of her life

•  2006 "having a hard time going home this time.  I feel sadness, emptiness and some kind of longing this day as I leave Apryl and Vaughn.  Not sure why or what it is about?  She seems so sad and lonely.  I am worried inside about her, my heart and mind concerned for her well being. I love and admire Apryl Ann, I love talking and hanging out with her.  What a awesome spirit she is. I admire her 'sense and Sensibility'!!!!  But...   I have to go home, back to care for Mom.  It's so sad to see her everyday and how she is now. She never wanted to end up where and how she is. ... I'm having a hard time keeping up with everyone and everything most often I feel stuck in the middle, it wears on ya!  She fell and broke her hip. She always said she did not want to EVER have a hip or knew replacement.  They said they had to do it.  I asked if they had to? the nurse looked at me like - you horrible idiot person "Her hip is broken".  Of couse they had to do the surgery.  I just knew she had said she never ever wanted to do it. They knocked her out, she didn't know us. She was back in the room at midnight.  She and I hand in hand I stayed with her all night.  Every time she would come to I would retell her where she was and what had happened.  She came too more so in the day she did not know me. She is hateful argumentative even physically! It's awful. like I said I'm having a hard time keeping up."

   My Aunt is a wonderful wonderful person, but she can be a little exhausting and eccentric!!!  WHen she came to live with us she had had a knee replacement and as the 5 years of caring for her progressed we discovered she had gotten a staff infection while having the surgery and so she suffered much pain and death by infection.  This entry goes like this....

"up off and on every two hours last night.  Then up this morning to help Auntie to the bathroom get her her kleenexs, some breakfast and prep her for shower, get her to do some exercises - all the while getting ayris and amric ready for school checking on Mom and making lunches!  and then say "I'll be back in 15 Auntie gotta take the kids to school."  Husband? do I even have a husband??? In 15 - I'm back, she is freaking out, no I mean freaking out!!! because "I was gone too long and Mom had not even looked in on her"!  Today I worked on Mutual for the YW and asked that they come to the house tonight, cuz everytime I leave auntie freaks out with anxiety so much that I do not know what to do with her.  I'm to tired to move, so I eat to keep awake, I'm divided so thinly between everyone - I've gained 20 pounds in all this.   Oh my my! I feel like I am not doing anything really really well. I like to do things the goooooodest that I can! HELP ME God!"

When my Uncle Otis was put into a "care giver facility" he called me begging me to come to help him, his stepkids had "put him away"!  Richard and I got in the car and drove 3 states away to help him.  Lets just say I was really sandwiched in this one!  Caught between step families, my brother, My mom, My children and my husband. It was ugly. 
 I was thankfully raised to honor, respect and take care of my elders - my family - the ones I love.  I can only hope that lessons can be and maybe have been learned for the next generations - XYZ! That would be the kids, and the babygrands!

I'll have to blog more about this one - I see here I have journals full of experiences to share! WOW!

Yes!  I guess as I look through old journals, I see the Sandwich!  The "Silent or Good Warriors generation" and the "Generations X, Y and Z" (it looks like from the research I've done) with me, the tail end of the "Baby Boomers - Sandwiched" in the middle!!!

I leave a prayer and a heart felt atta girl for any and all who are of the "sandwich" generation!  It's a tuff job to take on the responsibility of other people in your home no matter older or younger - God Bless you say your prayers!!!

http://www.lds.org/broadcasts/article/general-relief-society-meeting/2012/09/the-caregiver?lang=eng&query=parents
 http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/01/28/empty-nest-syndrome-doesnt-exist_n_2566671.html?utm_hp_ref=sandwich-generation

I "POaST" about my life = 1957

Preface!  

Yes, all you english majors, I know - I DO NOT NEED an exclamation point after preface!!!!!  But throughout this section of blog entries I am certain there will be lots of !!! just like in the scriptures it will probably mean WO WO WO!!!

I have previously documented in this blog format a series entitled;"31 Days of 31 Christmas'"  these 31 blogs are the "history" of our Sobczak Family Life.  My, well "Our" son Amric just left 27 days ago to serve a mission for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints, he will be gone for 24 months.  For the next 24 months I will "blog" my individual "life History" one year of at a time!  I know, you're thrilled!!!  My only hope is that some day it might matter, I am grateful to have my moms, grandmothers and great grandMothers Histories and privileged to add these (although I don't know if I can print all of this as a book or not?).  So if you follow along every month around the 27th I will update my "history" one more year, I will tag them by year with the labels/keywords. (I have to spell the "rules" out for myself so that I remember!)  The object of this "project" is to help me count down the months, sort thru stacks and stacks of letters, journals and family keepsakes/genealogy info to get my life history finished and keep me positive and productive for the next 24 months until my Amric returns home!!!   and so the story goes....

What big ears I have!

 I was born a poor Red head!!!

as my mother and father described it the "color of a carrot" and so "Loreal"(erase the grey!) and I try to keep it along those same lines to this day!

This is me, in our bath tub I guess, looks more like a metal dish pan! Also note, that my girls are not allowed to put any kind of naked pictures online I hesitate in posting this, but it's my own picture I can embarrass myself - really - it's all about the PAN!1957

This picture is me in a blessing dress that my Aunt El bought me that I also put on Apryl when we all went to the temple to be sealed as a little family.  I still have this dress and hope that someday - well, I don't know what I hope to do with it, but maybe someday someone will wear it again.  I have a metal trunk full of clothes that my mom had from all of us, no one really wants them, but I can't seem to part with them, it seems rude and disrespectful, Plus they are like antiques!  Speaking of antiques this chair I'm sitting on is one that was made of maroon, redish velvet!  My Aunt El had a living room set with a couch and this chair - I do in fact remember this furniture and will tell you more stories about this as we go along. Lets just say George, the Siamese cat and I could not sit on this furniture together!!!

Blessing dress

hand croquette blanket Auntie made for me, also still have it!

So... I have a story for you. . .  When my mother got pregnant she was told that she could not carry me.  She had had 2 or 3 miscarriages before Timmy, so she knew that loosing a pregnancy was always possible for her, every pregnancy she had was hard for her and put her life in danger. To add to this the she was going to be 42 when I was to be born and they didn't have all the information, equipment and skills that they have today.  She said she wanted to try and carry the baby anyway. She started hemorrhaging off and on and then more and more.  The Doctors told her to abort the mission!!!  She choose not to (obviously!!!) she had the priesthood from our church come to the house and give her a blessing.  While they were there they issued her a call to be the Primary President, (the primary is the organization in the church that leads, teaches, sings, has activities with these children who are ages 18 months - thru 11 years.  She accepted.  My Dad I understand was supportive.  Maybe as time went on Judyann would support her too but as I understand in the beginning not so much!!!  Mom got pretty sick and was put on bed rest. Judyann ended up doing all household chores.  Mom asked the Bishop to release her feeling that she couldn't do the Primary calling any more.  

This is a letter written by grandma to remind of the miracle it is that "I" even was born and to keep me focused!  Thank you Grandma.

The Bishop gave her a Blessing in it he told her that "if she would keep the Primary calling she would be blessed to deliver a healthy baby no matter the circumstance".  So mom being faithful, kept the call.  Judyann kept doing the chores and the men kept being the men!  Tom 7 years older than I and Timmy 14 years older than I, (big difference), Judyann 12 years older than me.  So we were kinda spread out.  Anyway...Mom gave birth to me!  I was born!  the miracle is .... the Doctor reported that I had been carried this whole time without the availability of a whom and that is why mom had kept bleeding so much.  She said that they always wondered what in the blessing was meant by the words "no matter the circumstance".  So she always said I was a miracle baby and thus she expected from the very beginning alot from me.  It was a constant annoyance, let me just say that!!!!  But now, as I have a family and I miss my mom so much I thank Mom and Dad for their willingness to deliver and to God for even being here!

INTRODUCING --


My brother Tom Philip (named after our grandpa Tomney):

Tom 1956

Tom 1957

Tom says; "I don't really remember anything except you were born the same day that LUCKY SOCKS (A buckskin colt we had) was born!"

Disney's
Mickey Mouse Club in 1957

In the World ...

Buddy Holly and the crickets recorded the number 1 hit right before my birthday in  1957  "That'll be the day"

The world forever be changed with the introduction and flight of Sputnik...

http://www.pbs.org/wgbh/nova/space/sputnik-impact-on-america.html

In the Church  - During 1957 October 

The semiannual general conference was canceled due to a flu epidemic.

General conference canceled because of flu epidemic.

Church Membership at end of year: 1,488,314
New Converts : 71,583
Percent Change from previous year: 5.05%

[Spencer W. Kimball] Undergoes an operation for cancer of the throat; one and one-half vocal cords are removed.

A note mom had; List of people who came to visit Mom and I at the Hospital when I was born;
Daddy, Ella Arthur, Betty and Marj Lindsay, Harriet Harrison, Marquerite Harrison, Celia Hampton, Eve Lee, Ila David, Cherrill Jones, Myrtle Daily, Bill and Leona, Afton Clark (moms BFF), Arthella and Berk, Mary Morris.  
Gifts; Dress, Gloves, darning needles, tube for a radio, yarn to tie a quilt, milk strainers, lining for a quilt, and cleaner.

Grandpa Albert R. Lyman 1963

Albert R. Lyman and Gladys Lyman My Grandparents

Well on the topic of dreams, and probably why I think they are even important is that Grandpa wrote me this letter when I was very young about a dream he had about me.  And believe me he has 100s of namesake to dream about, so I always felt it meant something that he had the dream, and even more that he took the time to share it with me.

Grandma prefaced his letter with one of her own:
Blanding Utah
17 Nov 1963

Dear little grand daughter Kelly Sue,
     This morning I wrote a card to your Mother and this evening Grandpa has written a letter to you.  So I am going to put your Mothers card in your letter and you can give it to her.
     The day before we went to Manti Grandpa had been taking a nap and he awakened quite suddenly and was quite upset.  He said he had been dreaming about you and would like to take you in his arms and tell you how much he loved you -- and to tell you how very much he was concerned about you, and how he hoped that you learned to love the truths of the Gospel and that you would always live them.
    Then he told me about his dream, and said he didn't realize how very much he did love you till he saw you standing alone in his dream in that door way.
     It brought back to ming the dream I had about you and Judyann, and the deep love I felt for you both and the terrible anguish I felt in the dream when Judyann fell into the water. And how I clung to your little hand and felt so terrible that I hadn't hung to Judyann's hand also.
     I am sure that Grandpa loves you and Tommy, Judyann and Timmy just like I do.  and we both pray that our Father in Heaven will always protect you all and help you always to cling to the iron rod so you won't get lost.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ub-cyKa4Tk8
     Do you know the song about the iron rod? and what the iron rod is?  Have your mother or your Father read it to you and tell you more about it.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=55h0FS11Mlw
     Do you know the primary song  "I am a child of God".  Isn't it a beautiful song.  I love it.  I'd like to come see you and have you sing it for me.
     Good night little sweetheart.  Give Tom Philip a big hug for me and tell him to give you one for me too.  

lovingly
grandmother
     

Grandpas dream - and his letter it goes like this:

Blanding Utah November 17th 1963
Dear Kelly Sue:
     I want to take time to tell you about my dream, because it was about you, and I have thought so much of it since then, that I won't be satisfied till I have written about it.  (see he has to write them down too and he was a much wiser man than I)  
     In my dream U was going along a road with your Grandma and your father and mother and you.  We expected to meet somebody at a certain place, but when we got there, nobody was there to meet us, and while we waited we saw a house, and went to it.  Nobody was at home, so we went in and waited.

     When we heard somebody pass by, we went to the door to see who it was, and where they had gone.  We all went outside but you, and I think your other told you to stay in the house.  You didn't want to stay, and as I went out, I told you to leave the door open and you could see us.  We went quite a way from the house, and I looked back and saw you standing in the doorway.
     The people we heard had gone by, and we hurried on to see where they had gone.  As we were about to go out of sight of the house, I looked back and saw you still standing in the open doorway.  I said we shouldn't go away and leave you there, but the others said you would be alright, that we would be going back in just a little while.  But we went on and on, and I was thinking all the time about you there all alone.
     We saw a car stopped some distance away, and we went to it.  Uncle Dan and Aunt Need were in it.  They had been on a long trip, and had their car loaded with a lot of interesting things, and they had a lot of interesting things to tell us.  When we had been listening to them for quite awhile, I remembered with a start that we had left you all this long time there alone in that strange house.  I said: "I;m going back right now to Kelly Sue."
     I started off on the run, the others said they would be coming soon, but I couldn't wait for them.  I found in a little while that I had been going the wrong direction, and I turned around to get right, and got still farther wrong.  I came to where I had to go down a steep hill, so steep that I began to slide, and I dropped down into a dry ditch so deep I couldn't get out of it for a long way.
     I passed people going back and forth in that ditch, and not any of them could tell me where to go.  When I found a place where I could get up over the bank, I just didn't know where I was. I looked all around and thought of Kelly Sue as I had seen you standing in that doorway, and I was just sick thinking about you.

     I thought "She will have come out and tried to sund us, and she can't find us!  And we can't find her!  We can't even find her tracks! And I had got so far away in the hills that I didn't even know how to find that car with Uncle Dan and Aunt Need and the others so we could begin hunting."
     I just wanted to sit down and cry, and I was saying "O my poor little Kelly Sue, why were we so stupid as to leave her standing all alone there in the doorway!"  I felt so terrible about it that I woke up, and it was a great relief to think: "O good -- it was just a dream.  Kelly Sue is safe at home with her father and mother."  And I thought, as I remembered how bad I felt: "I do surely hope Kelly Sue will never be left to wander away and get lost."

Now with love and the best of wishes my dear Kelly Sue, 
I am Grandpa Lyman

What do you think?

Cattle

I'm starting to get the idea!  peace and gratitude??? IDK!

Yes another dream!  I wouldn't record them and talk about them except they are vivid, so very real that they are in my head til I do write about them!!!

This dream had corrals with cattle in them a lake, pond, trough, some kind of pool of water.  The corrals were laid out all around the water.  It was dry and dusty.  It was time for church.  Someone young man came to visit us.  I can tell you the names of the body builds of who he resembled, but not the point.  I could also tell you the personality of him as he talked to us, also I don't think its the point either, except to say that Richard baptized him.  Anyway  this kid came over and I sat down by the pool of water to talk to him, this is a place I felt peaceful and comfortable.  I do remember rationalizing I don't need to go to church if I am doing good hear with this kid.  Richard not happy didn't go to church either, instead he went out to wrangle some calves in his cowboy hat and really really western botton shirt!!!  I listened to this kids "problem" he had gotten himself involved with a woman who had a daughter now he found some letters that were in opposition to the "story" she had told him and he didn't know what to do.  end of story.

Now I'm in a corral with lots of cattle and one BIG BLACK HORSE. (I remember thinking in my dream about the dream the other night that I was suppose to compare the corrals with the All the cattle in them to the white house with all the children in All the rooms - WEIRD!)  I was working with the cattle and outside the corrals in the (I can't say pasture cuz there was none) dirt the cattle were getting anxious and starting to move which caused the cattle in the corral with me to start circling!  The horse started getting flighty and jumping so I opened the gate and herded the cattle out which started a stampede.  I could see over to Richard, his buttons all shinny and was a afraid as her wrestled with the calves the stampede was going to run over him.  I hollered "Are the outer gates open"?  I was afraid that the herd was all going to run out and I'd have to go herd them back in.  end of story.

I am awake now.



So today when we went walking Richard asked me "What do you like about living in Nebraska? and what don't you like".  As we talked I heard myself "I like where we live.  I like looking at the water.  I don't want to necessarily get in it, but I find it peaceful.  I miss the green of washington, but I don't remember looking out at the trees and thinking 'this is peaceful'.  I'm not all that over whelmed with Nebraska per-say  but I am grateful for our job and our home and for exactly where it is.  The water is peaceful, like my living room!"

Be Grateful.  Be at peace.

Interpretation:

Cattle 
To see cattle in your dream indicates that you need to proceed with caution in some situation or relationship.

To see a herd of cattle in your dream represents a lack of individuality. You generally go with the flow of things. Alternatively, it symbolizes prosperity.

To see a stampede of cattle in your dream suggests that something in your life is out of control.

Church

It is representative of your value system and the things you hold sacred.

Water 

To see water in your dream symbolizes your subconscious and your emotional state of mind. Water is the living essence of the psyche and the flow of life energy. It is also symbolic of spirituality, knowledge, healing and refreshment. To see calm, clear water in your dream means that you are in tune with your spirituality. It denotes serenity, peace of mind, and rejuvenation. 

Horse 
To see a horse in your dream symbolizes strength, power, endurance, virility and sexual prowess. It also represents a strong, physical energy. To see a black or dark horse in your dream signifies mystery, wildness, and the unknown. You are taking a chance or a gamble at some unknown situation. It may even refer to occult forces. 

Buttons 
To see a button in your dream indicates a metaphor for being too "buttoned up" or refrained. You need to let loose and be yourself. also to see a button in your dream indicates that you are stuck in some problem, situation or relationship. You need to push forward. Perhaps, it is time to make a new start... the dream symbolizes second chances.

Play Board Games!

"You Don't know what I look like when I'm not in love with you"Stephen VD





What does that mean really?  Are we different people when we are with Different people?  I'm thinking maybe as much as we think we don't change, maybe we do when we are "in love".  I know I use to say things like "We are who we are" and "Our peers don't affect us".  Maybe there is more to it than that. How in the heck do you trust enough to love ...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJjeWDvh6J0


Is it love?  the question was asked and reported here by Temma Ehrenfeld

"Well, I don't mind sounding Clintonian if I say it depends what you mean by "love."

The ancient Greeks had more than 10 words for experiences that we might call love. Eros was a combination of lust and romance. Ludus was uncommitted and playful.

So let's say we're talking about romance. The infatuation, the butterflies, the passion—all spurred on by a little neurotransmitter in our brains known as dopamine. And, yes, dopamine is the chemical behind many of life’s highs, including drug addictions (as the joke goes, “That’s why they call it dope").

That euphoria can last 17 months or more, according to research by Helen Fisher. Dopamine also stimulates the release of testosterone, the “liquor of lust,” along with the same bonding chemicals that make us protective of one another.

The quantities, timing and interactions of those big three—dopamine, testosterone and bonding chemicals--can trigger them to work synergistically or in opposition.

So, love surprises us. You might be in love and have no desire for sex. You might have detached satisfying hookups, only to discover you’re in love. Maybe you’re just friends and fall in love. Or, as the summer romance story goes, you fall in love and part with only fond memories. You can also feel lust for one person, attachment to another and romance with a third—all at the same time.

Then, to complicate matters, your brain’s chemical journey isn’t necessarily the same as your partner’s. That's why romantic love is risky: a “blissful dependency when one’s love is returned, a painful, sorrowful and often destructive craving when one’s love is spurned,” Fisher explains.

Chemistry is real..."

board game bottom left corner
Also only picture we have of this really fun evening!
 Same thing happened with
Apryl and Sean pictures lost forever
- Hold on to your pictures!!!

 ...  how do you know if it's real, what does it matter and  what do you do to keep that "other" person "acting, smelling, bonding" as always as if they are in love with you like it was 'in the beginning'"?  

One of my main answers is simple play board games!!!  Especially in day and age when there really is 'no board' any more even "board games" are played on your electronic devices not "together" to observe in the strategy, tactics  sportsmanship and reaction to THE GAME and really, isn't LOVE just another board game!!!?  We are just simple people that's for sure my example is (pictured here) when we held a wedding reception for Austin and Anona we had board games on the tables I'm glad to report that they have been happily playing board games ever since!

We are what we pretend to be so we need to be careful about what we are pretending.  Aristotle said "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act but a habit."
And you know what they say about habits . . . "The chains of habit are too small to be felt until they are too strong to be broken."    and at times can if you don't break them, break you.

My Mother as you know had her sayings - one of them was ... "Birds of a feather flock together" but when it comes to love, lust and the games we play I'm thinkin that's not entirely true.  Opposites do attract.  Good girls do want the bad boys.  Really isn't that what they did to us in Grease - we wanted her to put on the trashy outfit - she was impatient and didn't hold out for the end of the game and see him switch from the leather jacket to the sweater. . .    but then we are back to my orignal observation who are we when we love someone.


"I believe that we are who we choose to be. Nobody's going to come and save you, you've got to save yourself. Nobody's going to give you anything; you've got to go out and fight for it. Nobody knows what you want except for you. And nobody will be as sorry as you if you don't get it. So, don't give up on your dreams."  unknown

this was my motto - "I love you not only for who YOU are, but for who I am When I'm With You."  it shouldn't be different and if it is... play a different game other wise you are going to loose and you won't like who the other person is when she/he doesn't love you

Just my thought for the day.

Airplane Crash

Last night I had another dream ....  what cha think?

We were sight seeing in a place with a very blue sky.  We had several cars.   The Pool water ran into the ocean.  (sky was bluer than this picture but i like the house I'm going with this one!!!)  

 Different children were everywhere.  The place we stopped to stay at was huge and white stucco with arched windows and green, green grass surrounding it.  It lots of rooms and the rooms all were busy and light.  The living room window was a window looking out on the ocean where I could see a light house.  The floors were wood not cement I remember thinking that was odd.  A group was at the kitchen table and some sat at the bar.

We took the children to the drive Inn.  In slow motion I sat back and watched as we had hibachi grill going, they were cooking hotdogs! The girls were blowing on white cotton ball flowers and watching as the pieces blew away in the wind.  A truck was turned backwards to sit and watch the movie, the kids were jumping on trampolines to the side.  It seems as if I could see all of my family and their children.  Parkers were there and Zane decided to leave he was going to fly home in an airplane, he wanted to take some of the children and we discussed it and for some reason (I can't find it, I've searched my mind for it all day) he didn't go.  Some of the families did leave then and took some of the children.

In slow motion everyone else left the parking area all in a seemingly choreographed orderly manner.  I was left there alone when from the deep blue sky (which it couldn't have been right? cuz we were at the drive in - night time!) 

A plane shot out the blackest smoke, not white and then started nose diving downward.  Then in fast motion turned started straight at me.  As I watched it coming toward me above the Drive In Movie screen my life flashed before me.  Then BAM! it hit the screen blowing up everywhere crashing into the parking area and I woke up, my heart beating and my adrenaline pumping!!

Now I've been wondering somethings all day and I've gotten no answers - But one of them being this - am I dead?  

So lets just say today has not been very productive!!!!! Yikes.

interpretation:
Movie 
To dream that you are watching a movie suggests that you are watching life pass you by. Perhaps you are living vicariously through the actions of others. Consider also how the movie parallels to situations in your waking life. Observe how the characters relate to you and how they may represent an aspect of yourself. Viewing them on a movie screen projects them onto another person and thus makes those feelings and actions seem more distant. Your subconscious is trying to protect you from experiencing them directly.
Children 
To see children in your dream signify an aspect of yourself and your childlike qualities. You may be retreating back to a childlike state and longing for the past. You are trying to still satisfy repressed desires and unfulfilled hopes. Perhaps there is something that you need to see grow and nurture. Take some time off and cater to the inner child within. Alternatively, the dream may be highlighting your innocence, purity, simplicity, and carefree attitude. If you are fighting with children, then it implies that you are repressing your inner child. The children could represent someone in your waking life (coworker, mate, sibling, etc.) who is acting like a child. If you see children fighting in your dream, then it means that your sense of morality and character are in conflict.
Airplane
To dream that a plane crashes signifies that you have set overly high and unrealistic goals for yourself. You are in danger of having those goals come crashing down. Alternatively, the crashing airplane represents your lack of confidence, self-defeating attitude and self-doubt. You do not believe in your own ability to achieve those goals. Loss of power and uncertainty in achieving your goals are also signified.
Sea 
To see the sea in your dream represents your subconscious and the transition between your subconscious and conscious. As with all water symbols, it also represents your emotions. The dream may also be a pun on your understanding and perception of a situation. "I see" or perhaps there is something you need to "see" more clearly. Alternatively, the dream indicates a need to reassure yourself or to offer reassurance to someone.  It brings about hope, a new perspective and a positive outlook on life no matter how difficult your current problems may be.
Ocean 
To see an ocean in your dream represents the state of your emotions and feelings. It is indicative of spiritual refreshment, tranquility and renewal. Alternatively, the dream means that you are feeling empowered and unhindered. You have a positive outlook in life and are not limited by anything.

Out with the Old and In with the New Year ... 2013!

Hardin Family Knows how to Have Fun!

I'm on this kick this year that I'm going to be fun! And together with my daughter we are learning to not be so intense.

On New Years Eve we just happen to have the perfect setting for learning this new skill!  It is a skill I've come to believe!!!  No tension in the room, No crying or pouting, No hovering over anyone, No yelling, No drinking, No WAIT there was indeed COMPETITION! YES!!! It can be done!!!  

And here as I sit blogging away I remember it and think about it 23 days later, it still makes me smile.  What a great night we had!  I love it when families invite us to their home and I can feel the spirit of love, harmony and Christ.  And When music is involved, cuz that for sure is one that was, is and will always be lacking in my home - cannot carry a tune nor read any music.  My kids will only know me for "Now the Day is Over", before family prayer!!!  Anyway I got lost there for a min, I was thinking about going to Teares at Christmas and singing, feeling love, harmony and the Christ also in their home I guess, Ben's on my mind today  :)  anyway ... moving on  ... I miss Amric ;)

 

Games are tuff, it seems it might create anxiety or some sort of tiff.  Someone might be mad they lost, feel insecure they aren't the best or sad to not be included.  But not here, not in this Hardin home not on New Years Eve 2012.  Tooooo Bad I pass my headaches on to my kids.  We lost Austin for awhile there!

As Amric was already set apart to go into the MTC we were really striving to "feel the Spirit" of the thing and not bring on negative vibes - so what to do for New Years Eve, he was Already missing a ton of Football - (that was a sour note already! - so many puns)!!!  Anyway we were grateful to be included in our "In-Laws" planned, organized and WAY FUN night.

Blowing up balloons, telling stories, stacking plastic cups, and werewolves are just a few of the CRAZY things that went on, not to mention that a meal in itself was served every hour after 6 o'clock. 

Secretly beforehand My thoughts we how could any of this be fun without the TV?  Really?? Without watching the ball drop at midnight?  TRADITION!

But look at me - 23 days later I'm still smiling...  Thank You Hardin/Sobczak Family.

OUT WITH 2012 and in with 2013

As I am writing this I'm reminded of that old saying "whatever you are doing at midnight you'll be doing all year'!  

Well, I was with family and I was having fun.  New starts were everywhere!

At one point in the night we wrote habits we wanted to break or "something we wanted to rid ourselves of" and then placed them on this pile of limbs.... we burned Out the Old Habits with fire and brought in new habits with smiles and hope.  So maybe that is why I keep subconsciously thinking this year that ... I AM DANG FUN and I WANNA BE WITH PEOPLE THAT ARE FUN TOO!  I'm gonna have some fun :) 

“You never have to change anything you got up in the middle of the night to write.” 

and that's how I felt at midnight 2012-2013

 and again now at midnight!!!!

Bennnnnnnneeeeeee!

Once Upon a Time I taught a seminary class and I had some students!  One of them was named Ben Teare! I grew to LOVE the family Family Teare!  Our whole family grew to love the family Teare.  Ben was considerate and a whole lotta fun!  He wanted to drive fast, get outta the house, play hard and come to early morning seminary!  He talked of going to Africa on his mission!  He played a good game of soccer and always had a kind heart.

This is Benny and his buds; Logan and Chris!

We have some crazy stories from this house from putting in that pool, to the hot tub, the food, Nanny, to inside memorizing scripture mastery and watching Football and Zoolander!!!

I don't have a picture of Annie, Gary or Hannah advertising SUU so I had to use Ayris Joan - it's ok she was good friends with Benny and his buds!

It's so interesting to me how life plays out and that we only lived in the same city a few years, but on earth we travel in the same circles!  I know that in the eternities we will too.  From New Mexico to Blanding Ut, From Olympia Wa to SUU we had to meet up somewhere it's in our blood!!!  

Elder Teare

The roads traveled in Germany

When Elder Teare went on his mission he was so fun to write too I so enjoyed his letters - he wrote really good letters.  

When we went to the Temple (this one is in Germany) but we together went to the Albq. NM Temple a couple of times.....  I can see him still sitting there his humble anxious heart.

I know you say Ben - humble heart??!!!  hahaha! He does tend to brag a little and he smiles so much you just think he's up to something.  But Ben you are such a great example for me, Richard and the children!!!  (Ayris and Amric will love being called "the children!").  Amric still has the soccer ball, I'm surprised it's not out on his mission with him :?  When Amric left on his mission he pointed out that his letters I send are to be just as cool as the letters I wrote to Elder Teare!  So... wait?!?!?! He actually was paying attention - who knew!?  

The verdict is in  .... Ben is married to the most wonderful wife in the world, He's going to school, working, having a baby - he's Temple worthy!!!  He even checks in now and then still to this day.  Yep verdict mandates - He is  all grow'd up and making it look good!!!  
Happy Birthday Bennnnnnnneeeeeeeee!!  
We, the Sobczak Clan Wish you most Happy Day and many, many blessings to be yours on your road ahead!!!!

   HAPPY BIRTHDAY!