Play Board Games!

"You Don't know what I look like when I'm not in love with you"Stephen VD





What does that mean really?  Are we different people when we are with Different people?  I'm thinking maybe as much as we think we don't change, maybe we do when we are "in love".  I know I use to say things like "We are who we are" and "Our peers don't affect us".  Maybe there is more to it than that. How in the heck do you trust enough to love ...


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iJjeWDvh6J0


Is it love?  the question was asked and reported here by Temma Ehrenfeld

"Well, I don't mind sounding Clintonian if I say it depends what you mean by "love."

The ancient Greeks had more than 10 words for experiences that we might call love. Eros was a combination of lust and romance. Ludus was uncommitted and playful.

So let's say we're talking about romance. The infatuation, the butterflies, the passion—all spurred on by a little neurotransmitter in our brains known as dopamine. And, yes, dopamine is the chemical behind many of life’s highs, including drug addictions (as the joke goes, “That’s why they call it dope").

That euphoria can last 17 months or more, according to research by Helen Fisher. Dopamine also stimulates the release of testosterone, the “liquor of lust,” along with the same bonding chemicals that make us protective of one another.

The quantities, timing and interactions of those big three—dopamine, testosterone and bonding chemicals--can trigger them to work synergistically or in opposition.

So, love surprises us. You might be in love and have no desire for sex. You might have detached satisfying hookups, only to discover you’re in love. Maybe you’re just friends and fall in love. Or, as the summer romance story goes, you fall in love and part with only fond memories. You can also feel lust for one person, attachment to another and romance with a third—all at the same time.

Then, to complicate matters, your brain’s chemical journey isn’t necessarily the same as your partner’s. That's why romantic love is risky: a “blissful dependency when one’s love is returned, a painful, sorrowful and often destructive craving when one’s love is spurned,” Fisher explains.

Chemistry is real..."

board game bottom left corner
Also only picture we have of this really fun evening!
 Same thing happened with
Apryl and Sean pictures lost forever
- Hold on to your pictures!!!

 ...  how do you know if it's real, what does it matter and  what do you do to keep that "other" person "acting, smelling, bonding" as always as if they are in love with you like it was 'in the beginning'"?  

One of my main answers is simple play board games!!!  Especially in day and age when there really is 'no board' any more even "board games" are played on your electronic devices not "together" to observe in the strategy, tactics  sportsmanship and reaction to THE GAME and really, isn't LOVE just another board game!!!?  We are just simple people that's for sure my example is (pictured here) when we held a wedding reception for Austin and Anona we had board games on the tables I'm glad to report that they have been happily playing board games ever since!

We are what we pretend to be so we need to be careful about what we are pretending.  Aristotle said "We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence then is not an act but a habit."
And you know what they say about habits . . . "The chains of habit are too small to be felt until they are too strong to be broken."    and at times can if you don't break them, break you.

My Mother as you know had her sayings - one of them was ... "Birds of a feather flock together" but when it comes to love, lust and the games we play I'm thinkin that's not entirely true.  Opposites do attract.  Good girls do want the bad boys.  Really isn't that what they did to us in Grease - we wanted her to put on the trashy outfit - she was impatient and didn't hold out for the end of the game and see him switch from the leather jacket to the sweater. . .    but then we are back to my orignal observation who are we when we love someone.


"I believe that we are who we choose to be. Nobody's going to come and save you, you've got to save yourself. Nobody's going to give you anything; you've got to go out and fight for it. Nobody knows what you want except for you. And nobody will be as sorry as you if you don't get it. So, don't give up on your dreams."  unknown

this was my motto - "I love you not only for who YOU are, but for who I am When I'm With You."  it shouldn't be different and if it is... play a different game other wise you are going to loose and you won't like who the other person is when she/he doesn't love you

Just my thought for the day.

Communication 101

"They" say you learn from your kids!  Well one of mine is writing papers for college that force her to ask questions that make me think  today I enter some of my answers to her...

My father wasnt home much. while my parents were not divorced they lived separately daddy's business (1 on McDowell and 24th st. in Phoenix, 2 on Hardy and Priest and 3 on 1st st in Tempe) was a horse riding stable where he rented out horses for hourly rates ... I did not know we were dysfunctional! I was told he had to protect the investment and so he stayed with the tack, feed and horses. He came home on sat. and Sunday nights to eat, get clean clothes and watch Archie bunker with me! Sometimes during the week he would come home and sometimes I would go stay there on Saturdays especially if mom had to work - anyway up until I was in jr high and had things to go do on Saturdays. His communication was direct stern or sarcastic this is where I learned what I thought was humor!!! His communication was - cussing and yelling, I did fear that more than being whipped from my daddy. It made me feel little, stupid = awful.
and thus we see: physical abuse beats/hurts your body, derogatory language, verbal abuse beats/hurts the soul i think its worse cuz your brain is involved and it tells your brain you are unworthy.

Daddy would create conversation with me around mom about things that bugged her and we would laugh together, she never cracking a smile and not thinking anything said was funny, which made us laugh together even more leaving Mom out!
And thus we see: Sarcasim hurtful and a type and shadow of being a bully. (In writing that down I can realize that that is what Amric and I do to Richard! Guess I better work to change that)

My mom and I had long talks and were best friends. We could talk (when we weren't in a teenage parent argument) about anything. Mom and dad liked to go for drives. When daddy went I was not allowed to talk. But when it was mom and I we would go on forever talking about any and everything.  I do remember though at age 12/13 really bugging her cuz I talked too much.  Urlene and I would get in the car and go on and on about our lives giggling uncontrollably!
And thus we see: moms are great and unselfish letting kids talk about only themselves on and on until all you do is giggle and thats annoying!

Our communication to get me out of bed in the mornings for school from the day I started school was to call me. The phone was all the way across the house and would ring loudly scarying me into awake mode and then I would run across the house to answer the phone to hear mom say "up and at 'em it's time for school"!       Really I knew that! I did not like it too much at all and grew to hate everything about the phone except for if boys called of course!! And note hear I was never ever allowed to call them!  (a lesson I tried to teach my girls but has now been lost because everyone has a phone in there hands!)
and thus we see: face to face communication is the best! and being woke up in the morning by someone in the house is the best and communication is a gift, a talent and is being lost in translation in a high tech world.